Tuesday, 26 January 2016

Oh, brother (part 76) by Grant Harbison

Blaine and Bess arrived at the abbey
And were met by a monk by the name of Rabbie
He eyed Blaine suspiciously and drank ale from a pail. “Who are you?” he asked. “An’ fae where dae ye hail?”
“Blaine, jist answer the man an’ have no fear,” said Bess. “An’ remember everythin’ ah told ye. Dae ye hear?”
“Yes, my lovely mare. It’s nice to know that ye really care.”
“Who the hell are ye talkin’ tae, ya bloody bampot?” Rabbie asked him. “An’ yer speech is no Anglo an’ definitely no Scot. “Noo answer ma question. Don’t make me ask again, or ah’ll take ma axe an’ split yer brain.”
Blaine forced a smile. “I hail from the Emerald Isle. I’ve travelled many days and nights in the wind and rain. I’ve come to see Deplorium and my name is Blaine.”
“Ah can barely understaun yer brogue. Deplorium, did ye say? What dae ye want wi’ that wee rogue?”
“I come as friend and mean no harm. Deplorium once beat me in a wrestle of the arm.”  
“An’ ye expect me tae believe that’s true? The size o’ him compared tae you?”
“It may be true about the difference in size, but the wiry wee man took me by surprise.”
“Ah’ll gie ye the benefit o’ the doubt. Stay where ye are an’ ah’ll see if he’s about.”
After waiting a considerable while
Deplorium came to meet Blaine and flashed him a smile. “Well, if it isnae ma auld friend fae the Emerald isle. “How are ye daein’, Brother Blaine? Come inside. Let’s get oot o’ the rain.”
“What about my mare?”
“Ah’ll get somebody tae stable it wi’ the other pair.”
“I hope you don’t mind me droppin’ by?”
“Naw, ye’re welcome tae food an’ a place tae lie. Would ye care tae partake in some beet an’ grouse pie?”
“I’m so hungry I could eat a…of course.”

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