Oh, brother (part 13) by Grant Harbison

So Borium and Truman spent a month in the nick

Conditions weren’t great but at least it was quick

They made new friends and learnt new tricks

Played fun games like ‘count the bricks’

All in all it was time well spent

And they departed Rome with hearts content

Even though there was no love action

They’d experienced the city and beheld its attraction

But their arrival home rendered a few shocks

When they learnt that two brothers had contracted the pox

And Brother Ilirium had been sent to the stocks

For drunken revelry with a couple of Jocks

It was an effort for the monks to get back to the grind

And for the first few days they’d just wined and dined

Eventually Brother Ilirium was released

And they all celebrated with a sumptuous feast

He told them about another Viking raid

Maude’s new girl and the games they’d played

Her large dark eyes and ruby red lips

Her ample bosoms and curvy hips

And about her penchant for chains and whips

Borium and Truman thought that was insane

And asked Ilirium what gain there was in pain

He told them to go and visit the whore

Stressing that they would be begging for more

So off they went the very next night

With mixed emotions of fright and delight

There was more than one reason for them to be afraid

When their thoughts drifted back to the night of the raid

But Maude assured them when she opened her door

That they didn’t have to worry about that anymore

She’d found a way to keep the authority at bay

And as long as she continued to pay

They promised not to stand in her way

The monks clapped their hands and paid their fee

And told her who they’d come to see

Maude smiled broadly and said, “Come with me.”

And to Mistress Paine she introduced the boys

Who eyed them coolly and said, “The naughtiest boys make the most noise.”