Sunday, 6 December 2015

Oh, brother (part 51) by Grant Harbison


Deplorium was first out of the hole
Caked with earth like a burrowing mole
Borium followed suit
While Truman remained and passed on the loot
“Back, safe and sound,” said Deplorium when they were all above ground. “Prosperity comes tae he who dares. Open the bag and let’s see oor wares.”
Borium opened the bags to let the contents unfold. “Jewellery, silver and gold.”
Deplorium rubbed his hands and began to twitch. “Stick wi’ me and ah’ll make ye rich.”
“A fair amount of treasure, that’s true,” said Truman. “But who in this wilderness do we sell it too?”
“Dae ye think that in a place this remote that there’d be naebody tae come and spend a groat? There’s many a traveller and many a boat.”
“I must admit, I am rather scared,” said Borium. “What if we’re accused by an angry laird? He seems to know a lot about you. Maybe he will suspect us Anglos too.”
“Dinnae worry, ah’ve got everythin’ planned. We’ll make a fire oan the strand. That’ll be the signal for the boats tae come, and it shouldnae take much negotiatin’ tae fetch a tidy sum.”
“Deplorium, I’m sure you are right,” said Truman. “But by the time we arrive it will be broad daylight.”
“Ah don’t mean noo, we’ll go tonight.”
“Deplorium!” cried Borium. “These pilfered goods we cannot keep!”
“Relax, wee cousin. We’ll dig a hole and bury them deep.”
“Borium, let’s just have faith in Deplorium,” said Truman. “I’m in dire need of sleep.”
“Aye, wee cousin, listen tae yer pal. Tae protect ye both from harm, ah certainly shall.”
“I only hope you are right, I’ll be wishing the hours away till it is night.” 

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